Meet the PP Founders - Tanyisha

Hello all you lovely lot

My name is Tanyisha, I don’t have many nicknames and the few that I do have are just my name shortened.

I’m 35 going on 15 (or 50 depending on the mood I am in) and I am what the fashion world would consider plus size. Personally; I think I am just too unique and that the fashion world should stop using labels on people’s sizes, but hey! That’s is why I joined Positively Perfect. I want to help change this.

My past is one littered with being bullied because of my size, looks, and because I had the confidence of a wet towel.

It wasn’t that I was large, but because I was different. I didn’t want to fit in, nor did I feel the need to try. I felt people should be accepting of me. This idea never worked. But, it is one I still hold onto this day.

I was the large one out of the family and was always compared to my siblings. How thin, beautiful and handsome they were and why I couldn't I lose some weight? put on some make up? straighten my hair? be more girly? not do sports? go on a diet? The list goes on!

The only person I really had in my corner was my Dad. He told me to be me. When my parents split up, it was a lot harder for me to be me. So instead I took the me I wanted to be and locked it away and became a false version of me because no one was accepting me anymore.

The happiest day was when I had left home and went to University. I had an epiphany of waking up and looking in the mirror and realizing that it was time to stop being the false me. It was okay to be me. Forget trying to be what the media and world wanted, start being me. So, I let the old me out of the vault I had placed it in and since then haven’t looked back.

I will admit, I do look back at my old photos and say to myself that “Man, I look so skinny there” or “Wow, look how pretty I was”. In reality though, I have grown as a person who accepts myself. Yes, I am larger now, but I am happier. I also am a burlesque dancer. Which has helped me get a lot of the confidence I had lost over the years back. In no way am I fully 100% confident, but I am getting there slowly. My support group has grown, from my husband’s family, my lovely stepmother/mother, friends, the PP ladies, and even my co-workers. I know that I can turn to them if I need someone to talk too or cry on.

I also have stopped comparing myself as one thing I have noticed is that everyone wants something on their body to be bigger, smaller, rounder, firmer, flatter, plumper, darker, lighter, curlier, straight or another color. I could go on. In the end, I think we all need to not let the outside world influence us and for us to start accepting ourselves. Once we do that, then the fashion industry, media and even society will then realize that what they think we want and what we actually want are two different ideas. Hopefully, they'll realise that all shapes, sizes, colours, types are beautiful, unique, and perfect as they are.

Tanyisha
Founder Member, Model & Burlesque Beauty

Meet the PP Founders - Jess

I’m Jessica (Jess) and I am 32 years old and size 30/32 dress size. I am a founding member of the Positively Perfect movement and I couldn't be prouder to be. You've heard a lot of introductions from us all.... well there are 10 of us! I hope you can see what an amazing and inspirational group of women have come together here.

Being a size 32 is sometimes, I think, harder than being any other plus size. It seems to be that most plus size brands "dare" to cater for up to a size 26....anything above this seems to be taboo even in the plus size market place. I want to change all of that, and that's why I am here. We are labelled as plus size women (and men) and that term alone doesn't really bother me.... after all it's better than being a "Larger Lady".

However, if they are going to call themselves plus size brands then I want them to cater for all plus size women upto and including a size 32! I also have the mind set that if these brands are going to cater for plus size women.... then it only makes sense to display their clothes on plus size models!? It's just so simple!

I must admit that I have always been over weight and "fat" and I have no problem in acknowledging that. I have had the fortune of being the fat and funny one in most groups which has helped me a lot during my life. Whilst school really wasn't a problem for me, I have found far more prejudice and ignorance as an adult and when you think about it.... that's really sad!!

Through movements like Positively Perfect I hope we can spread love, support and education! An education on the ignorant judgements made, as a size 32 I must be lazy, eat chocolate and chips all day and I couldn't possibly exercise! When in fact I am constantly active in my job, I enjoy Pasta and Chicken for my lunch and I swim 2-3 times a week!!

I am so passionate about inclusion and diversity and at PP we are nothing if not diverse in ourselves. I obviously have my own agenda with being plus size but PP isn't just about that..... Positively Perfect is for everyone. It's for you, your best friend, your mum, your dad, your neighbour, even your Nan...... because you see everyone is Perfect just the way they are, and we want them to realise that!!

I am a plus size woman and I am Positively Perfect!!! Jess OUT!! (Mic drop!)
Jess
Founder Member, Model,  Face & Brave Girl

Meet the PP Founders - Emma

When people ask me to "tell them a bit about myself" I struggle. Seriously I do. It's like I don't want to give too much away about myself for fear you may actually be my nemesis and therefore destroy me with my very own words...

So... taking a big deep breath.

My name is Emma and I'm a 46 year old married mum of 3 boys and I come from a glorious little village just outside the big smoke called Penge. I don't do much. Stay at home mum, cleaner, theatre lovey, rainbows leader, not clever enough to go to university. Still debating what I want to do when I grow up.

When I was younger I was always the "big girl" so was sent to dance at a young age to help sort out the puppy fat, however it just encouraged me to be hilariously funny to steal the limelight. That basically was how my life went. I've always been the "fat funny one". I used my comedy timing to cover my insecurities about my weight, made a joke about myself before anyone else could.
I wasn't a particularly attractive kid either... So it was all down hill really... I laughed at me before you could.  I made the fat jokes.  I'd got the "funny parts" in the plays. I'd play the fool. The fugly. The one who is always game for a laugh.

But while I'm laughing and joking on the outside and giving it all look at me...inside I'm actually shy as anything absolutely insecure and scared of your opinion of me, worried about how I'd look and if anyone would actually think I'm "pretty".

When I look back now, I realise that my weight issues and insecurity started in my 20s, within a very controlling relationship. I lost weight to please him and lost myself within the process. I recently found a picture from that time and I look so sad!

I became pregnant at 25 and discovered a new found love for these curves and bumps and feeding to grow my gorgeous bundle of boy, all the while being mocked by my partner for being fat.
When we eventually split up I emerged like a butterfly from a cocoon and, after a little while and many kissing of frogs, found my soul mate. Who loves every bump and curve and gave me two more beautiful children. I'm not saying being a mum is all I am. But with 14 years separating the youngest and the oldest they are my one thing I have accomplished in my life. That I haven't got wrong or messed up.

I have brought my amazing boys up to love someone no matter.  They have and will grow into fabulous husbands partners and hopefully fathers, and I hope will bring up their children to love unconditionally.

We are all different and that's what makes us unique. I embrace my body shape and size and don't feel embarrassed or make those "jokes" anymore. Sure I've been thinner, yes I've been heavier, but now I realise that it's just a number, like age, and I've never acted that either.
It's only recently dawned that people love me for me. Not how I look, or what size label I have in my jeans. I'm a bloody nice human being, I'll help anyone that needs it and make a damn fine chocolate cake. And if all else fails I'll sing you a song!

So there you are, that's me in a nutshell. I'm humbled by these other amazing women in PP and those that are connected to them. Who have stories to tell and who's lives have been far more interesting than mine, but it's fate that brought us all together, I believe for some reason...whether it be to conquer the world or to make people stop and think and change their attitude to themselves and others. But whatever it is I'm glad I'm doing it with them.

See....I'm my own nemesis!

Emma
Founder Member, Actress, Model & Cheesy Ball Lover

Meet the PP Founders - Emma K

I won’t bore you too much with going all the way back to the beginning because from what I have heard, I was a rather boring baby.

My name is Emma or Em for short, I’m 25 years old, 6ft tall and 19 stone and dare I say it, I think I am pretty awesome sometimes.

Right from an early age, it was quite obvious that I was going to take after my dad and be tall. By the age of 14, I was 6ft tall and I stopped growing. It was at this point my life took a turn.
Being taller than most of the school I became the victim of bullies, everywhere I went, I was bullied due to my height, I had people sing ‘ho ho ho, green giant’ everywhere I went, I was tormented with the generic ‘what’s the weather like up there’ comments. This finally started to take a toll on me and I hated myself. The only thing that kept me sane was my sports, I was and still am an avid hockey player and I played Netball at school and I was bloody good! Unfortunately, when I was 16, I sustained a knee injury which turned my life upside down, I spent 8 months on crutches not being able to walk and the doctors not knowing what was wrong with me. I wasn’t allowed to play sport, the one and only thing that got me out of bed and kept me going.

By the time I was about 18, I was still injured, I unfortunately fell into what I now know to be a depression, I comfort ate ALL the time and within the space of about 6 months, I had gone from a size 12 to a size 28 and weighing 26 stone. All I saw when I looked in the mirror was a beast, a real-life version of Godzilla, I couldn’t stand the sight of myself but to the rest of the world, I was fine, I was just Emma, the awkward happy fat girl.

Due to my low self-esteem and lack of confidence, I thought I was unlovable, who would want me, a big fat giant slob, so when someone came into my life, I thought ok, maybe I’m not that bad, but that person who I trusted and who I cared for was not the person I thought they were and suddenly our relationship took a turn for the worse, due to various things that happened in the relationship, I became a shy timid person who was so insecure and broken inside that I didn’t even recognise myself anymore, I was just the shell of a person. I fell even further into a depression. It was at this point in my life that I began to self-harm, I wanted so badly to punish myself for everything I was. It is a choice in my life which yes, I do regret, but at the same time I don’t because it has made me who I am now.

I eventually started to diet, I started to do exercise, against the doctor's recommendation (don’t tell them) and I started to lose weight, and as my weight dropped off, I started to get my spark back, my family could see it, my friends could see it but more importantly, I could see it. I found my way out of the darkness and found myself again.

During the next few years I was locked in a constant battle with myself to get back to who I was. By the time I reached 23, I was in a good place, I was in a good job, my knee was being dealt with (still not fixed to this day though), I was playing hockey again, I was volunteering with the RAF Air Cadets, I was HAPPY.

I was still learning to be more confident in myself and believe that I could do what I wanted to when I met Matt, a 5ft5 (ish) Geordie, 7 years my senior and who was just so different to anyone who I had ever met before, he saw me for exactly who I was, he was someone I could be myself around, snorts and all, someone I wasn’t afraid to let in. I could be the ridiculous, geeky, make up free muppet that I am, I could come out with something really silly or really dim (daily occurrence with me) and he would just look at me with his big brown eyes and just by the way he looked at me I could see that he loved me. It was his support, his encouragement, his faith and his confidence in me that I figured out who I was again, I got my spark back, I got my confidence back and to this day he continuous to encourage and support me in all I do, even stripping down to my undies in front of a camera.

So here I stand (well actually I’m sitting down typing), with my stretch marks, my scars and my wobbly bobbly bits, with a group of women who inspire me every day to keep going and keep building who I am and I can get one thing from PP it would be to make a difference to someone, and if person so happens to be the tall girl who hides in the background away from everything, then so be it, that to me is mission accomplished.

Emma K
Founder Member, Model, Pageant Princess & Sporty Girl

Meet the PP Founders - Chelle

Hello all you gorgeous people.  I’m Chelle, yes its short for Michelle but that’s the only thing that’s short around here. At 6’1 I’ve always felt like I don’t fit in…. because let’s face it, I don’t!

Growing up I was always the weird awkward girl that never joined in with the girly things. My siblings and cousins were boys as I was growing up, so I just joined in with them. I liked cars and football, not makeup and hairstyles. Girls clothes didn’t even fit me, so why bother.

I’m 36 now and only just getting my head around eyeshadow. It’s been a colourful life, full of ups and downs. Some incredible highs, some absolutely glitter spangled highlights and some pretty awful lows. As a result, my body isn’t quite the slim, toned one I used to think was fat and disgusting. This one really is!

But do you know what? I am so proud of this body. It’s taken a long old time…36 years in fact, for me to be able to reach that conclusion. And it hasn’t come easy.

For me it’s taken meeting these 9 women. These Positively perfect specimens of female solidarity, love and support. Having them remind me each and every time I put myself down. Because I do, a lot. I guess it’s what us big girls do isn’t it? Get the joke in first. Pretend like if we make the joke then the other people won’t. And hey, it’s not like we haven’t heard them all before anyway.

These girls are helping me see that I am more than my size. Because I am far from the finished project. It’s one thing agreeing with the body positive sentiment but living it.. that’s hard. It’s hard to look at your naked wobbly belly and be ok with it, but I’m getting there.

I may not like how my body looks. But I love what it has done. It has produced two of the most amazing humans. It has survived domestic abuse, its beaten cancer. TWICE! It has swam in oceans, it has bungee jumped, it has ridden camels in the dessert, it has earned me the love of people I adore and most importantly….its still going!

It has managed to do all those things, and do you know what? I can’t remember what I was wearing during any of that! Because I’ve come to realise that life is judged on our experiences, not our wardrobe.

I’m always going to be tall. I am always going to be plus size. But I don’t always have to watch from the side-lines, because I don’t care what I look like anymore I just want to take part.

Because I’ve realised I don’t need to change, I’m already positively perfect.

Chelle
Survivor, Crusader & General Wonder Woman.

Meet the PP Founders - Katie

Hello lovelies,
My name is Katie. I am 42 and come from Derby.  I am lucky enough to be married to my best friend (sorry you may need a sick bucket).

I am a size 24 and have multiple rolls and bulges and I am slowly learning to love myself.

In April, last year I was lucky enough to be part of a photoshoot with over 100 plus sized women and this day has changed my life and my attitude Towards myself for the better.

I have always been a big girl. Growing up I was always the big one in the class and have had many an insult thrown my way.  I have always had my own style though and never really followed fashion. 

Just as well really, as 30 years ago, there were nowhere near the amount of plus sized clothes available to youngsters.  I was a size 18/20 from the age of 12 and most fashion shops only went up to a 16.

I have been on various diets and mad exercise programs but I have never been very successful.  I have never liked the way I looked and used to feel less valid than thinner girls. I have spent a good chunk of my life wishing I looked like someone else.

But all of that changed when I walked into the room on the day of the shoot. Never before have I seen so many absolutely beautiful women. There were all shapes and sizes and several of us were the same dress size but looked nothing alike at all.

They made no apologies for who they were or how they looked and why should they? They were absolutely scrumptious the lot of them!!

It made me think....  Maybe I am Pretty? Maybe the people who paid me compliments weren't humouring me or taking the Pee.

Why are we so quick to believe any horrible words spoken to us? But never listen to the nice words.
The support and genuinely touching comments that I have received when I told friends, work colleagues and Facebook friends that I was modelling was amazing.

My husband has always told me I am the most beautiful woman in the world and although I am not going to believe that I am ready to start liking myself and eating well and looking after my body because I want to.  I am worth it.

On this day, I met some true lifelong Friends.  Some of the most courageous and amazing women.  We got together and decided to create Positively Perfect. We all agree that people need to like themselves more. It doesn't matter what colour, creed, gender, height, age or size you are, you owe it to yourself to be kind to you.

We all need to speak to ourselves as we would speak to others.  We wouldn't tell our best friends that they are disgusting because they can’t fit in their jeans or that they are ugly because they are not a perfect size 12. So why tell yourself that you are?.

Today is the day to start loving yourself.

Katie
aka KitEH. Founder Member, Model, Vintage Lover & Glitter Queen.

Meet the PP Founders - Jan

Hi,

My name is Jan aged 62 and a semi retired Finance Director (Chartered Accountant).

I'm an intelligent articulate female with 3 dogs for company and many friends who tell me I'm a fun person with a great sense of humour, a young outlook and an interesting life story.

After my husband had a heart attack and stroke 6 years ago through undiagnosed diabetes, we relocated from Surrey to Northamptonshire to be closer to one of his daughters and her family.

Sadly in May 2015 he was diagnosed with MND and died 20 weeks later. So I have been a carer for a while with a terminally ill husband and now I'm facing the future without someone special to share my retirement with.

I didn't worry too much about my weight gain through hyperthyroidism because my husband really couldn't have cared less. He loved me for the person he'd helped to develop over our 30 year marriage. My body was just a vehicle but my brain, my personality, my essence was what he loved. I felt secure, loved and safe. After he died I had to take a long cold look at my reflection in the mirror and sadly, didn't believe I was anything more than what I saw looking back. I was so wrong. I'm still that same thoughtful person that he loved and my body doesn't and shouldn't define me.

I am trying to be more spontaneous but do need a little shove now and again. I have a big personality and will try anything twice - just to make sure it's what I want or don't want. But I'm compassionate, caring and very loyal.

I joined a group of 9 strong determined women in November last year and despite our cultural, ethnic, location and age differences we formed Positively Perfect to promote positive body image. The ten of us wholeheartedly believe in what we're doing and hope to continue to deliver the positively perfect message.  I was also elected in September last year to the board of Trustees of the Motor Neurone Disease Association to try and help future sufferers of the awful disease which robbed me of my husband.

I enjoy the theatre, cooking, visiting and entertaining friends and of course I have my archery to fall back on if I feel sporty. I was a longbow and recurve archer and coach when I lived in Surrey. I'm watching far too much TV now but it does mean I have spare time to spend promoting Positively Perfect.
 

As the eldest member of the group I feel I have a unique perspective to offer. I'm proud to share a platform with these inspiring, strong and uniquely beautiful women. We all have a different story yet we all live our lives hoping to change individual perceptions of beauty. We are all beautiful in our own way. Be proud of yourself and stand tall. Everyone then has to look up to you. Be kind, be thoughtful, be honest be kind to everyone.

What you give out you get back. Smile

Jan
Founder Member, Model, Chief spellchecker and Mumma Chick.

Meet the PP Founders - Tracey

I am a single, black, plus size women living in a small country town. I am also a Shopaholic, makeup addict blogger, YouTuber and beauty queen. That isn’t even my day job. You can tell I like to keep myself busy.

I go by the name Big Healthy Tracey but you can call me Tracey because, well, everyone else does.
 
After years of hating myself and my body I decided it was about time I done something about it in 2015. With a very healthy push (ok more like a drag) by a very good friend of mine, I entered in the plus size beauty pageant ‘Miss British Beauty Curve’ in their over 29 category ‘Ms British Beauty Curve’. I was shocked to find out that I was accepted as a finalist. I was completely floored at the fact I ranked 2nd runner up.

Nowhere in my wildest dreams I thought I was ever good enough. I was fat, awkward, anxiety ridden. I also kept myself to myself. I only let people know what I wanted them to know. I didn’t want to share my deepest thoughts or even what was going on in my life. My mind was filled with self-doubt constantly. Winning even the place of 2nd runner up done more for me that I would express in worlds. 

I never felt any better about myself and I started to realise that I was good enough no matter what. The judges saw something in me and I was not putting up any front. I was being myself.
 

The past 18 months have been a whirlwind for me and now I am entering the most exciting phase. Positively Perfect.

I love being part of this group. We are so different but with the same passion and vision. To show the world that it’s not just black and white and you can’t judge a book by its cover. 

Fitness and health isn’t determined by size. Education isn't determined by what you chose to wear or a lack of tattoos and piercings. You can’t judge someone’s potential by what you see on the outside. There are 7 billion people in the world. How could we all possible fit in the same mould?

We are all Positively Perfect, we need to embrace that.

Tracey
Founder Member, Model, Make up artist and all round Queen

Meet the PP Founders - Jonas

So, if you only briefly glance at the Positively Perfect page, you could be forgiven in thinking it's all about ladies learning to love them selves and not falling foul of what common pre conceptions of image should be.  But it's NOT just ladies that are affected by image and attitudes of others.

All the PP ladies know me quite well by now, I'm Katie's shadow, I'm always here to lend a hand, we're both very similar in so many ways and we love our adventures together. 

But most people don't really know the real me, it's all a front, I'm not confident or outgoing, I'm ridiculously shy, and really can lack confidence in things I'm doing.  That can be a problem when I teach people for a living, standing in front of people and being the authoritive person is not something I relish, but I've learnt to do it over 44 years. 

It started at birth, born in the Midlands, living in the South, so a "Brummie" accent, bright red hair and a silly name to boot (thanks Mum!) that did me no favours in school, I was always bullied.

Even once I started working I had bosses that called my peanut or ginger, because Jonas was so hard, or worse Jo, what? because 'nus' is so hard to pronounce?

So how did I change it? How could I change the way people perceived this awkward ginger person with a silly name?

I finally realised that I'm me, I'm not the one that's wrong, why hide my differences? Why not emphasise them.

So (back then) I had long red hair, I made it redder, fluorescent red in fact,  and settled on being called J, for those people with the inability to cope with Jonas as a name.

I work in design, photography & training. So meeting people at events was easy, which one are you? Oh you'll spot me! And people strangely found the fact I was "totally" different, a lot easier to deal with and accept. Which gave me a front to hide behind and seem outwardly more confident.

Fast forward several (20) years and although the hair is now short, and greying. I finally have the confidence to deal with everyday life and have the confidence to not let shyness stop me, in fact it's the opposite. I'm the one egging my amazing wife on, in her positively perfect pursuits.  

So that's it, that's me, all I can say is we are all different in so many ways, it's not wrong, it's what makes life and people interesting. 

Cherish your differences.

Jonas aka BigRedJ
- The PP Designer & Photographer